Over my head in stuff to do but come hell or high water, I still want to post something interesting.
Recently, since the Fukushima disaster has really calmed down (hint: don't drink Japanese tea, eat beef or mushrooms) access to core topic blogs, like this one, have really gone down.
Used to be that I could easily hit 8,000 readers a day. Nowadays, I'm averaging about 1,200 ~ 1,400. What a bummer!
I guess that what people really like are gory tales of nuked earless rabbits or giant jellyfish from the depths of the ocean... They don't really care if the Japanese government is sending us into bankruptcy.
But they also like it if this blog is filled with sexy photos and useless stuff like that that you can find anywhere on the internet. So today, I want to experiment. Yesterday's page views was 1,358. Today, I'm going to do the cheesecake thing again and write about sex in a test to see how many reader I can get today.
Besides that, if I write "Sexy Japanese Babe" in the post title, or use the word "Sex" I can depend on a comfortable number of page views for the day.
I haven't been doing the cheesecake thing recently because, well, "Been there, done that." But today, I will have the word "Sex" in the title and not in the way one would expect it.
Here's an article from UPI that claims that Japanese men show nearly 300% more satisfaction in their relationships than US men do...
UPI Reports:
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It may be common in Japan to talk to strangers about your marriage duties in the bedroom. However, Americans really don't like that kind of stuff. Just look at Tiger Woods. Not once did anyone talk about his marital bedroom duties. They only focused on his duties to his mistresses. That's American etiquette right there.
If you want more American readers you should talk more about your mistresses. Invite the paparazzi to post undercover photos and videos. Your ratings will really go up when your wife leaves you a pauper in the divorce proceedings.
That would be a great time to revive the Chi Pass Music Show. (Fire your producer, however. They mis-spelled it as, "Cheap A**ed Music Show".) Get Scot Horton to call in with a daily US rant. Then you can match him with a Japanese rant. Make the show *interactive* by getting disaffected Japanese college students to rant about anything. There must be lots of anger and rage building up nowadays on various hemispheres.
It also helps to copy the Gong Show (the way American Idol did). Bring a lot of untalented jerks who can't sing and laugh at them. People never seem to get tired of that. Have people call-in and come up with witty, non-constructive criticisms.
Everybody wins and has a nice time. Even your neglected, yet highly satisfied wife ;)
Laughing hysterically at this post, between leers. Mike feels bad about how few people look at his blog, he ought to take a look at the stats for my blog (hint: you could count the views each day using the fingers on one hand).
Getting back to the cheesy subject at hand, after having made a close study of the subject material at the recent hanabi taikai matsuri(fireworks show festival) out here in the sticks, I can verify with certainty that Mike is right about Japanese women. They are far more sexy and beautiful than American women.
Now, I have to go and look for the hidden cameras Mike put in our house. How did he know about the nookie once every leap year!
"A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat! Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, say no more."
Classic Python.
Anyway, post an update and let us know how this little experiment goes. I need more readers too. :)
Guys, here's an update as requested by Jimbo and a few others.... Yappari... I received an extra 100 readers this day after this article.... Not only did this particular article garner more readers, but those readers also read other tabloid "sex" trashy stuff on this blog.
The results? Good. The picture of the girl on the beach? Faaaaaabulous!
You know, that evidence might just be rather inconclusive. Just to be sure, you'd better make more posts with pictures of scantily clad Japanese women... for posterity, of course. Maybe a weekly swimsuit edition would work even better.
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