What is an "Assault Rifle"? Should They Be Banned? The Facts:

I have been railing on the idea that guns should be controlled or banned in the USA. I do that because it is obvious that inanimate objects do not control human behavior. (For more on that read: Obesity is the Number 1 Problem Facing America Killing Over 300,000 a Year! - Ban Spoons! Enforce a "No Pie Zone" Over the USA!)

Usually when I do write about "gun control" I get some silly illogical mail from some people that merely tout nonsense and has no sound logic as a basis for discussion. Basically, I get the "You are a member of the NRA!!!!" (Nope. I don't even think there is an NRA in Japan.)

But today, I did get one email that is rational. It's from Bill.

Please read:

I think there is a misunderstanding about gun control and gun bans. I personally do not own a gun and have only fired a hunting rifle. But I do think that in America that there should be a right to own guns. But my question to the people that want to own assault weapons is this: why? Anyway, this gun violence in America is more than just guns. It's violence. And mental health. The country after Reagan closed most of the Federally funded mental institutes in the 80's let all of those individuals out on the streets. The place that many of them now reside. The other home for them is prisons. As if that's not a tax payer burden. So maybe the country is not doing enough to assist and protect its citizens. Instead the gov't spend tons on wars. And another reason that all of this violence? The society here in America. Or better yet, the government breeds violence. We're violent country. There were 20 kids killed in CT recently and that's horrible. But American troops kill endless amount of children in foreign wars all the time. Where's the outrage about that? But back to my first question. Why do you or anybody need to own an assault rifle? And the answer is not the 2nd Amendment. That's not a good enough answer. I wouldn't mind hearing one.

- Bill

Thanks Bill. It's nice to get a mail that's not written from someone who is foaming at the mouth. I agree about the foreign wars and killing kid and violent country part, but I think, Bill, that your argument is solid up to that point. Please see the video below as to why.

Anyway, thanks Bill. Here is what I wrote back:

Bill, Thanks. You ask a good question. May I humbly suggest that you get better information on what you are talking about? Specifically, "What is an 'Assault rifle'? Please watch this video made by a former policeman with testimony from the Bureau of Tobacco Alcohol and Firearms: "What Is An "Assault Rifle"? - You've Probably Been Lied To" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yATeti5GmI8)

Now, you tell me: In a nation that was built on violent revolution and gun ownership with such a violent history of murder (War Between the States killing over 700,000 Americas), genocide (American natives estimated over 4 million dead), the largest prison population in the world (over 2 million people in prison), an out of control level of urban violence (gangs) and constant foreign war and police brutality in general - along with the fact that there are now over 300 million guns in a nation with the population of 311 million people... The utter idea that gun control will work seems preposterous on the face of it.

I wonder if Head-banger Jason, now a member of the Crips, or Renaldo, member of the bloods, will turn in their guns... Sure if they trust each other to do so...)

For more on the absurdity of thinking inanimate objects cause crimes, see: Obesity is the Number 1 Problem Facing America Killing Over 300,000 a Year! - Ban Spoons! Enforce a "No Pie Zone" Over the USA!

Also watch: "Choose Your Own Crime Stats" (The stats they'd rather you not hear). (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ooa98FHuaU0)

NOTE: I have owned guns before and hunted before. But I don't like guns at all and, of course, do not own one now. (If I lived in the USA, I would and I'd be trained on how to use one)... But my entire reason for writing these things is that I don't believe that I have the right to tell you how you should live and what you should do. Nor do you have the right to tell me what to do and how to live. The federal government certainly does not.

To outlaw law abiding citizens from owning an inanimate object on their property (and on themselves) is the opposite of freedom. I write these things because people need to wake up and see that this is not really an issue about guns, it is an issue about freedoms.

To control guns means that you just create another excuse for the police to come on your private property and take away your right to peace and privacy. Why people cannot see that astounds me. 

Obesity is the Number 1 Problem Facing America Killing Over 300,000 a Year! - Ban Spoons! Enforce a "No Pie Zone" Over the USA!

"Obesity, Diabetes, Heart Disease, High Blood Pressure costs this country more than $120 billion dollars each year." - Michele Obama

It is well known that obesity is Americas number one killer today. Don't believe me, just take a gander at a photo of Michelle Obama as she makes the quote above. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black! 

"The spoons made me do it!"

Recently many people in the USA have been calling for a gun ban as we all know that inanimate objects (as well as God, dogs, voices in the head and Frank Zappa recordings) can and do control human actions. Guns are responsible for about 9,000 deaths in the US annually. Meanwhile obesity, er, I mean, spoons and forks, account for over 300,000 deaths. Where are our priorities?

Of course we need to ban all guns and ammo (as well as camoflage clothing, night vision glasses, camping equipment and Sterno lanterns). But, let's get our house in order and set our priorities straight! We must fight back against the obesity epidemic by severely restricting spoons and all other types of silverware and table utensils.

The real problem with America today is obesity... Therefore I propose a federal ban on spoons as too many Americans eat far too much ice cream and sweets... I also propose enforcing a "No Pie Zone" over all major American cities.

I have pitched this idea and done so for absolutely free (no copyright claims to come from me as I do this for the greater good). I have also shown this idea to my intelligent friends on Facebook and asked for their opinions. I think you'll find the following exchange of ideas to be quite refreshing and invigorating....

Let's now put our heads together and find a way, a true way, in the American spirit of bi-partisanship in finding the best way to deal with this obesity scourge that is obviously caused by kitchen utensils. 

I have a dream! Today spoons and forks, tomorrow ice cream cups and tabel cloths!

Let the discussion begin! Here's how we tackle this obesity epidemic once and for all! Here are selected quotes from today's distinguished panel! 

Red Brown: You need to move incrementally--you can't just throw this down all at once. First you need to make people register their spoons, and also restrict the capacity of spoons allowed. Once that becomes accepted, you can move towards limiting the number of spoons a person can have, and you can also restrict the movement or exchange of any spoons. Then, and this is the important part, you announce that there is a bill in the works to criminalize any and all silverware. Finally, you strike down all the provisions of this new bill except banning spoons of any type. You also move most of the old spoon restrictions over to forks. Everyone thinks they got off pretty well and gives up their spoons--easy as that!

Marc Abela: Since you don't want to alarm everyone, first I suggest we increase taxes and add bureaucrats who will build a paper based federal spoon-registry list.... all spoons will need to have a serial number on them, and they will need to be registered and attached to a clearly identified owner...

Me: Good idea! I suggest a federal commission be created to study the feasibility of federally mandated studies studying registration of spoons. Perhaps we can implant chips in the spoons to make sure individuals are not sharing their spoons with other people in violation of section 23.10009234B of the "Freedom in Spoonerisms Act of 2013." My only fear is that people will use loopholes to get around the laws and insist, for example, that those little plastic spoons you get at Starbucks for stirring coffee be exempt from all federal regulations and taxes.

Robert Gibson Hill: Make everyone eat with a coke-spoon.

Me: Harrumph! Are those Coke spoons under 16oz size?

Red Brown: Unfortunately, a huge black market, of illegal spoons from foreign countries and also locally made spoons, explodes into existence and the Feds create a new bureaucracy called the BATFU (Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco Firearms & Utensils). This monstrosity consumes 1/10 of our federal budget and most of the employees are grossly-overweight. It doesn't matter though because nobody but extremists and conspiracy theorists give a shit.

Me: "BATFU !?" I laughed so hard coffee came out of my nostrils on that one!!! Well, it's all good on paper, but will it really work? Usually, as Ron Paul says, "Enforcing No Pie Zones" is an act of war under the Geneva Convention.....A precedes a full fledged military invasion (to seize spoons). Can the US afford such actions under the current economic environment? I think not... That is, unless, of course, the invasion pays for itself when we melt down those spoons and resale the metal to China (like the Iraq war was paid for by oil seized).

Red Brown: The BATFU is here to see you! They are now working with the DHS (Dept of Household Security) and need to see your kitchen. A no pie zone has been established between Wendy's and Arby's, where your neighborhood is.

Red Brown: It is illegal to have your own black market pie, but you can buy commercial pies--they just taste like shit and cost a lot. I have heard there is a pied pipeline, from Mexico, and you can get pies there--they all taste like cinnamon, though.

Me: I hear Hostess pies are still available down on Market & 5th street. Ask around....

Red Brown: 'm cracking myself up just thinking about this--what a total folly it always is when the government sets out to help us by harming us.

Me: No! No! You are not adult and mature enough to understand the difference between a safety spoon and a dangerous one. Sure, sure, some people say spoons are a "Gateway utensil" that, later on in life, leads to even more over eating, but that hasn't been proven in laboratory tests!

Me: Heads Up! They just made these illegal! 

Read the description on this pocket monstrosity! It says, "Look like a big honkin’ swiss army knife, the Eatensil is designed for the kitchen. It combines seven tools which make eating easier—a spoon, fork, knife, pizza cutter, chopsticks, bottle opener and wooden chip fork—all in a Swiss Army Knife-type casing." "The Eatensil"???? We've got to put a stop to this!!!!

Red Brown: Remember, food is bad. The last two letters are OD (outside diameter) as if it were some kind of sick joke. I used chop sticks the other night--they are the bolt action rifle of utensils, for sure. Easy to manufacture, though. How anyone could get fat with those damned things is beyond me...

Me: You are either with us or you're with the delicatessen owners.

Marc Abela: Hahaha, thanks for the great (great) laugh. OK so, I'm ready when you are, my "but spoons DO help" poster should be ready in a few moments (for the moment all the crazy revolutionary rebels come shouting our way "spoons don't feed people, people feed people!").
  Yep. Outlaw guns because guns cause gun crimes. Outlaw glass bottles at bars because glass bottles cause people to get their necks slashed. Outlaw kitchen knives because they stab people...

But remember to shout down those who don't think that inanimate objects control people to do things they normally wouldn't do. The evidence is there and the science is decided....

If anyone says "Spoons don't feed people, people feed people" make sure you print this article and shove it down their throats.... 

Because everyone knows printing machines cause choking.

Ban Guns! Ban Kitchen Knifes! Ban Everything! Ban Freedom!

Here's a final thought about guns and control and banning perfectly legal activities before the New Year. Actually, it's not so much about guns per se, but about a philosophy. That is a philosophy of freedom.

Let's see... What's the most effective? Banning human behavior or banning butter knives? I know! Let's ban gangs and drugs! How well has that worked out so far?

This ridiculous nonsense about banning guns is getting out of control. As my good friend Red Brown points out; "Gun control will only serve to criminalize large numbers of citizens and give police more reasons to violate our privacy."

Yep. Think about that.

If guns are made illegal then it will criminalize what law biding citizens do. 99.99% of all gun owners in the USA do not commit gun crimes. Why would we want to make their ownership of an inanimate object a crime?

Isn't this similar to drug laws? 

Think about it. Under a true philosophy of freedom, like Libertarianism, you are free to do as you wish as long as you don't bother other people. You are free to own private property and to seek happiness.

The important part of private property that people need to understand is that the most basic private property is ownership of oneself. You own you. You know what's best for you. I don't know what's best for you and certainly the government doesn't either. I have no right to tell you what to do and how to live. You have no right to tell me what to do and how to live. Certainly the government does not either.

If you want to take drugs then are you hurting anyone? No! If two consenting adults want to have sex, is there a victim? No! If someone wants to gamble their money away, does that hurt you and me? No! If someone wants to have a gun on their own property does that hurt you or me? No! Hell if someone wants to be stupid and drive without a seat belt, does that harm you or me? No! Definitely not (hopefully Darwinism can be put back into effect!)

Allow people to do with their private property as they wish as long as they do not hurt other people.

Also, think about this; the utter idea that an inanimate object like guns are the cause of gun crimes is incredible on the surface. I read an intelligent quote once. It said, 

"If guns are responsible for gun crimes, then it follows the same logic that video cameras are responsible for child pornography." 

There was another one that said, "We don't blame cars for drunk driving. Why do we blame guns for gun crimes?"

Anyway, the philosophical point is that we cannot curtail people's freedom. Like I wrote, the vast majority of gun owners do not commit gun crimes, why do people want to outlaw what they do? By what right do people think they can do so? And, finally, is anyone so daft that they think if they outlaw guns that criminals and Bloods and Crips and other gangs are going to suddenly become good boys and girls and turn in their weapons?

Laughable.

The biggest problem with this banning and registration (control) of weapons (or any behavior for that matter) is that we start down a very slippery slope. First registration, then more curtailments, then banning of some arms, then wider restrictions; finally a total ban. Don't think so? Well history proves that I am right... 

Oh, and for you folks who think that the citizenry should be unarmed and only the government should have weapons, well, 20th century history shows you where you are completely wrong about that. Governments killed over 200 million citizens in the last 100 years... 

From Predatory Politics:

During the 20th century, around 40 million people died in international and civil wars. Yet nearly 200 million, about five times as many, were killed by their own government for their race, religion, imputed political dissent, to fill a murder quota for no reason at all.

Watch the video below for further proof....

"Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it" - Edmond Burke

History of Gun Control: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1pKasF6l3y0

Oh, but this time it's different. Banning guns is not the same thing....You think this is a big joke? You think this is stupid? Really? Well I did mention about the slippery slope. Read on: 

British Doctors Call For a Ban on Kitchen Knives to End Stabbings:

"A team from West Middlesex University Hospital said violent crime is on the increase – and kitchen knives are used in as many as half of all stabbings. They argued many assaults are committed impulsively, prompted by alcohol and drugs, and a kitchen knife often makes an all too available weapon. 

They consulted 10 top chefs from around the UK, and found such knives have little practical value in the kitchen. None of the chefs felt such knives were essential, since the point of a short blade was just as useful when a sharp end was needed. 

The researchers say legislation to ban the sale of long pointed knives would be a key step in the fight against violent crime. “We suggest that banning the sale of long pointed knives is a sensible and practical measure that would have this effect.”

There is also a humorous quote at the start of the article. It says, 

"The good news is that if we ever do get that assault rifle ban, followed by a handgun ban, followed by a ban of anything that can shoot bullets, the “Banners” will still have a banner year of banning all the other ways with which people kill other people."

Yeah. When will the stupidity ever end? Not soon. Now a woman wants to ban beer drinking glasses and glass beer bottles because her husband was killed by a broken glass in a bar brawl. You can't make this stuff up!

Campaign to ban glass from pubs goes to Downing Street

"A widow whose husband died after being stabbed in the neck with a glass bottle is taking her campaign to ban glass from pubs and clubs to Downing Street. Philip Sherriff who was from Preston was attacked at a London nightclub on a night out in April. Tomorrow she's going to London to lobby the Government to change the law. Philip Sherriff Credit: ITV Granada His wife, Jane, says his death was totally preventable and has launched the campaign in his memory. She said: "I don't want anyone to go through what we've gone through, the devastation has been enormous."

Will the idiocy end in 2013? Nope. Remember when Politically Correct language was fringe? I do. Now it's everywhere. This banning all sorts of behaviors (because you are too childish to be able to handle a butter knife or spill your drink) will only get worse.

Have a Happy New Year...