Sunday, July 17, 2011

Drinking Way Too Much and Touching a Computer is a Very Bad Combination

Having a blog is great. It is just like an online diary of life. When you blog, you get to record everything that happened in life. Like today. Today, I am going to write about getting drunk and acting like an idiot.

Last night was only the second time I got pretty drunk this year. I know that because I blogged about the last time I got drunk which was, dangerously, recently I see. I say "dangerously" because, you see, I have gout. People with gout shouldn't drink at all. So you might say that since I have gout not only did I get drunk and act like an idiot, I must be an idiot to drink in the first place!

If you said that then you'd have a pretty compelling argument. 

The time before that recent drinking episode, when I got too drunk was Dec. 27, 2010. I know that to be true because I blogged about that time also. (See? I have an online record of my booze escapades! Wonderful me!)

I used to really like getting drunk and, of course, I don't get drunk very often at all anymore. In fact, since I got Gout a few years ago, I basically stopped drinking.  

If you've ever wanted to stop drinking then I highly recommend Gout.

Gout will will stop your drinking forever. And, since I blog, I know that I got my first bad case of gout in Feb. of 2009 when I went to New Zealand and ate and drank like a king! I wrote about those adventures with gout in Gout Sufferers of the World Unite!:

The first time I had a Gout attack was in February of 2009. I was staying at a friend's ranch on the beach in New Zealand and, of course, I was eating and drinking to extreme excess every night. Then, one morning, I woke up and my foot hurt like it had been run over by a Sherman tank! I thought I was going to die! The pain was excruciating!

But, still, that didn't deter me from fishing. I hobbled down to the ocean and waded up to my waist (which really felt good on my foot) and I sucked it up like a real man every day. Caught my limit too! I mean, we have to consider what's more important here; is it my quickly deteriorating health or my heading down to the beach to catch fish?

Then the second time I had a gout attack was in early December of the same year. I had to fly up to northern Japan to meet some big shot executives from a Chinese Airlines and arrange their TV/newspaper promotion in Japan. By the time the promotion ended, my foot hurt so bad from gout attack that I could hardly walk. 

When I checked into the airlines, the girl at the check-in counter saw me noticeably having trouble not looking like a spastic. She then asked what was wrong and I whispered to her, so that no one else could hear, that I had gout. She looked genuinely concerned and said, "Oh, you poor dear! My father suffered gout too!"

So, instead of my flying back to Tokyo in Economy Class, that kind young lady put me in First Class. How lucky I was. I began thinking that maybe this gout thing isn't so bad after all.

Later on, I was trying to quietly enjoy the flight (though my foot was killing me) when I saw one of the flight attendants smiling and looking right at me. I straightened my tie and smiled back but then I figured that since I am near sighted, she was looking at someone else. I tried to get some shuteye and peeked at her to see if she was looking at me anymore. She was! After awhile, I noticed that she kept looking straight at me and smiling over and over again. My heart sang. I thought, "The old boy's still got that magic!" I gave her a mischievous grin and she smiled back.

Oh, stay my beating heart! I'm old enough to be her father… er, older brother, I surmised. Then while I was picturing holding hands with her and running madly in love up some faraway sandy beach laughing together, she started walking up to me.

I braced myself. I wondered if my breath was OK. Maybe she wanted my phone number. Maybe she'll be lonely tonight in Tokyo? Great, but what will I tell my wife?

She came directly to my seat, offered me a blanket and said, "Mr. Rogers?" I jumped a few feet in the air. How did she know my name? And her English was perfect! She continued, "Mr. Rogers, can I have your phone number?" I smiled knowingly at her as I pulled out a piece of paper from my pocket, wrote down my number and, with a half-wink, I handed it to her.

"What's this?" She said.

"Silly," I whispered while slowly flashing my bedtime eyes to her, "You asked for my phone number."

"Pardon me, Mr. Rogers," she replied, "There must be some misunderstanding. I didn't ask for your phone number, I asked, ‘Is your foot feeling better?' I'm sorry my English is so poor."

My face turned beet red. I told her that I was fine and acted like I was sleepy so she would leave me alone. She walked away, out of my life forever, and behind the curtains where the other stewardesses were… A minute later I could hear them giggling.

I'll bet they were giggling at my expense too. Talk about poor service! I'll never fly on that airline again! 

Later on, when I got home, I told this story to my wife (well, not all of it) and she accused me of trying to pick up the stewardess in First Class.

The article is a humor article but having gout is no laughing matter! Gout hurts like hell! Anyway, thanks to gout, I don't drink and I really don't miss drinking so much. I feel much better when I don't drink (even one beer makes you tired the next day... Really! Try it and see!) 

Anyway, last night I got too drunk. Since I've stopped drinking regularly (I used to drink every night!) I've become very weak when it comes to alcohol and it seems that I get really drunk really fast and very easy on a small amount of liquor. I guess even a few drinks is way too much for me anymore in my old age. But, that's OK because I really do think that drinking is bad because it makes me  stupid and lazy.

Since getting gout a few years ago (I also wear bifocals!) I eat at least 70% of my diet in only raw food. Eating raw food is great.  I want to feel young again and have lots of energy for work. Raw food works wonders for that! Raw food, though, does not go well with drinking alcohol. I love eating raw food. That's why I don't miss drinking too much and find it easy to avoid alcohol.

In the old days, I could down an entire 750 ml liter bottle of Korean liquor (25% alcohol) or two or three bottles of good wine all by myself at dinner time. I did that every night! Then I'd take a shower and still think "I better have a nightcap before bed." 

Now, since I don't really drink anymore, I have to be really careful because I get really drunk on just a little bit of drink. Seriously, last night I had two shots of Korean liquor and three 350 ml cans of beer (it was hot) and got way too drunk... Actually, I am surprised at how drunk I got! Of course, having an empty stomach plays a big part in how drunk one gets and I was very hungry when we started drinking. Also, since it was blazing hot, I think I guzzled those three beers quickly since I hate warm beer in cans. Yuck!

But I know I got way too drunk when my friend complains to me about emails that I sent when I was drunk (like an idiot) and I don't remember it at all... Nope. I remember writing and complaining about something, but do not remember writing so many emails on the same subject (sign of drunkenness) and, when I woke up this morning, I didn't feel so hungover.... At least not nearly as much as I did the last time I got drunk. So, not feeling hungover means that I didn't drink so much.... But not remembering means it hit me like a freight train.

As many people know, drinking and writing emails are usually a bad combination and I don't usually do that. But, I am so ashamed and embarrassed that I did that last night. Yikes! 

Once again, I feel ashamed of myself... When? Oh, when will I ever learn?

I have heard (and read about) others who were guilty of the same thing; drinking too much and writing emails. I didn't think well of them. Now it is me who is guilty of that (maybe not the first time?) and I feel like an idiot and feel very ashamed. I apologize to my friends who I sent stupid emails to and I also apologize to the people who wrote emails on a drink before and I thought poorly of them. 

How does the old saying go? "People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones!" The next time I hear about someone getting drunk and writing stupid emails I won't say, "That idiot!" I will say, "Oh? I hate it when that happens!"

I guess it is not stupidity (maybe it is) but a definite problem with drinking booze is that you loose good common sense and do stupid stuff like driving a car or sending emails.

I see where they have been developing new features on cars that won't allow the user to drive if they are drunk. Now, when Apple computers comes out with this device for MacBooks, I bet every person in the world who likes their drink, will buy one. 

Maybe my wife will buy me one for Christmas.... Which, if all goes to plan, will be  the next time, and last time, I drink booze and get drunk in 2011.


Anonymous said...

Gout Is bad. Since I basically stopped eating spinach (which I really like and used to eat a lot of) I haven't had a single bout of gout in quite a few years now. I still drink, but not like I used to do... I used to drink a lot after I stopped experiencing gout, so I doubt gout is caused by alcohol. I don't know though.

This morning, after drinking a ton last night, I feel just fine, not tired in the least bit, I was even a bit energetic. Usually I attribute no bad after effects to having ate or drank fruit/fruit juice, this time I didn't eat or drink any, yet the Person I was with who didn't drink a drop of alcohol was feeling like they were hung over big time,... go figure?

I think maybe a hangover partially has to do with some small bad element getting into the fermenting process of the alcohol, or so I've read. I avoid cheap beers and beer in a can, maybe that is part of avoiding hangovers and gout attacks too?

In addition to your writing, I admire your determination to catch the fish.

Andrew Joseph said...

I, too would have tried to pick up the woman - just to see if I could. Sucks about gout. I have a variety of concerns too... Sleep apnea was one of them. I couldn't drink and didn't drink for 8 years until I got a CPAP machine to help me breath at night. Before that, I needed my brain to be fully functional to get me to wake my body up to breath! The last time I went out and got hammered was on my 34th b-day. 11 different drinks and a tray of shooters... I believe it was 34 to match my age. I have no idea why I am still alive. I admire your tenacity with your diet and wish I could do the same. Lay off the booze, my friend! Since I have the CPAP machine, I can drink again, but there aren't many days when I want to.

mikeintokyorogers said...

Gee Andrew, I hope your condition is getting better.!

Murasaki Shikibu said...

We need to come-up with some good wholesome recipes for gout sufferers: A low purine diet that still tastes good!

mikeintokyorogers said...

Thanks Murasaki san! Those recipes you have at your blog look fantastic! I've linked to your blog too!

Anonymous said...

I would add, I was told meat played a role in getting gout, but,... I haven't stopped eating it and I still didn't get it again. Your mileage may vary of course. However I did cut out the hotdogs, Gyros and other sausages, so maybe that was the other delicious guilty party? I do miss them.

I still think spinach played the biggest role.

I only mentioned any of this in the hopes it helps you, or even another Person?

mikeintokyorogers said...

Actually, yeah. I was blown away when the doctor told me that spinach was bad. I mean, after all those Popeye cartoons, how in the world could spinach be bad?

I miss it too. I used to eat it everyday. No kidding. I used to put lots of it in my morning juice blender too!

Funny thing too, since we stopped eating spinach completely, my wife no longer gets hives. Weird, eh?

Anonymous said...

yes, that is weird. I had no idea.